How to Succeed in Life and Work By Homer Page  

Aimee was born in St. Charles, Missouri, in 1971. Ms. Wehmeier was born with muscular dystrophy, a severe disabling condition. She uses a power wheelchair for mobility, and since she has the use of only one hand, she uses a computer keyboard which is set up for operation with a single hand. She has a number of personal care assistants, (PCA's), that assist her with the basic activities of daily living. Her life has not been without its challenges. When she was five-years-old and ready to start kindergarten her parents were forced to fight to get her in a mainstream public school. At that time there were no special education programs or federal law requiring the schools to accommodate children with disabilities. A few years later her parents divorced, leaving Aimee's mother with little time or financial resources to assist her severely disabled daughter. While these years were tough for Aimee and her family, she acknowledges that they were also helpful for her development into an independent adult. Her mother had high expectations for Aimee, requiring her to take her turn with her sister and brother at household chores. Aimee did the dishes and folded clothes, when it came her turn, and while it took her longer, she did her chores well and took pride in her contributions to the family.

While Aimee was growing up, she avoided other people with disabilities. However, when she went to college, she met a woman with a disability, who became a mentor. Her mentor was the director of the campus office that provided services to students with disabilities. For the first time she began to have a positive attitude toward her disability. Her mentor had a job and a family. She was living a normal life, and Aimee started to believe that she too could live an independent productive adult life. Over the next two decades she has grown in her confidence and pride in who she is. She has learned to deal with and overcome her fear of being alone and unable to care for herself. She attributes a good deal of this growth to her relationship with her first mentor and continuing relationships with other persons with disabilities, who, as she, are managing the challenges of living as a person with a disability.

In 2006 Aimee's career took another direction. Her community involvement and networking had led her to serve on the board of Services for Independent Living, an agency serving a multi county region. When the Director resigned, Aimee was encouraged to apply for the position. She did and was hired to be the Executive Director. She now has the opportunity to share her philosophy of independence with many others. As she reflects on what the elements for living a successful life may be, she identifies five major components. One must encounter high expectations from others and must accept those expectations for oneself. Next one must develop competence through education or training. One must have marketable skills. Than one must network with others, especially other persons with positive attitudes toward his or her own disability. One must also get a chance to prove oneself, and finally one must balance independent selfhood with the desire to give to others, to make a contribution to ones community, and to be a good friend to others. Aimee also points out the importance of living a healthy and disciplined life. One cannot be successful if his or her health will not permit it. While one cannot always control ones health, there are many things that one can control. Aimee watches her weight, gets adequate rest, and manages her necessary personal assistance in a disciplined and professional way.

Aimee Wehmeier is a model for other persons with disabilities, but beyond that she is a guide for everyone. She has challenges, some of them or rather severe. She has experienced fear which has at times limited her options. She has spent some time during her youth looking for the confidence to go forward, and she has held back, because she was afraid to be alone. But Aimee has confronted her challenges and overcome her fears. She knows that to be truly successful in life and work one must be productive, do the hard work, not make excuses, manage ones own life, and give back for all that one receives. Aimee enjoys laughing and having fun with her friends. She owns and affirms her own life, just as she is. She has created a life that is worth affirming. Is there any greater wisdom?